Living with a dog is like having a furry drunk person following you around all the time.
i remember way too many small details about people so i have to act dumb sometimes so i don’t freak them out
One time when I was 7 i went to this big department store and there was giant rugs hanging from the celling and you could move them to see more rugs, so i moved one and there was an employee sitting behind it eating a bag of Doritos and I screamed and started crying and the store gave us a free rug
lets play “which tab is that music coming from?”
I love how they just fucking throw that last domino.
WAIT DID SOMEONE THROW A DOMINO AT IT BECAUSE THAT ONE PART DIDNT FALL IM DYiNG
i feel like this is really elegant, but then there’s this rebellious group of dominos. and someone is like “the fuck you think you doin” and knocks them the fuck out
i MUST ATTRACT A MATE WITH MY MATING CALL
WHERE IS MY MATE
A MATE HAs beEN ATTRACTED
THEY USE THE CHARMS OF RAD SHADES TO RECIPROCATE YOUR SEDUCTION
IT GOT BETTER